To Whom It May Concern:
Here’s a letter I e-mailed Philips, a national corporation, complaining about something:
Hiya… I just bought your “4 in 1 Complete Cleaning System.” “All you need to clean CD/DVD” it says on the package. I haven’t tried it yet, so I assume the product itself is fine. What’s got my tail twisted into knots is the horrible, terrible, miserably misbegotten hardshell plastic packaging the product comes in. Have you ever tried to open one of those things? It’s neigh on impossible, I tell you.
Here I’m sitting in my comfy robe and slippers, cat snoozing gently on my lap, adoring wife by my side as I stare in complete bafflement at this fine example of impervious packaging that encases your product in a shell of transparent plastic that’s so tough I’m not sure a diamond-tipped drill could make so much as a scratch. All I want to do, you see, is get a DVD to work, thus ensuring me an afternoon of peace and quiet. But instead, I now have a distraught wife, and angry cat, several cuts and scratches on my hands as I sit here, surrounded by various knives, scissors, box cutters and razor blades. I’m reasonably sure I just heard my cat say a bad word, and I’m fairly certain he learned it from me as I struggled to open your product.
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